Speak It

Love and Hate

Serious words

They have deep meanings

But we use them in ways that show

We don't fully understand

We speak them over everything

Making their implication as shallow as the accusation

So maybe the true mission was accomplished

To make each...somehow less

But hate does not diminish for lack of understanding

Instead it's power grows

Love on the other hand

is watered down for lack of understanding

Love was created to cover sins

it was meant to unite

Hatred to divide

Love used to be all encompassing,

because it came with a price, but was priceless 

You couldn't buy it, you couldn't pay for it, 

Sacrifice was the only acceptable currency 

But now, love is as thin as its shallow application

It is as meaningful as the food, and tv shows, and temporary fixes that we wrap in it;

You can't cover anything with it

That's why the world is so cold

The Bird with the Yellow Feathers

They spoke of her feathers.
'What bright yellow feathers!', they exclaimed
They ignored the cage
Yellow is happy
She must be happy
Her cage was gold, but a cage nonetheless
She wished she could hide
But the cage would suffice
In keeping her watchers at bay
They ogled and smiled
She's happy, so happy
But failed to see the cage in the way
Perception is tricky, From afar,
 the bird's yellow feathers was seen clearly through the bars
But up close, 
she was different
quiet, lachrymose
Why?
She had a song she wanted to sing
But no one cared to listen
They looked at her feathers instead
Soon her song was forgotten
She didn't even remember how her song went
So the tune languished
She just showed them her feathers
That's all they wanted to talk about.

The Train (2008)

Gotta catch this train, before it passes on by,
past this town, past my stop and straight out of my life.
It's like a morgue where I stand,
because the winter is near
but I wait patiently for my train to arrive.

I count the trees just to pass the time,
but their stoic and fearless appearance only reminds me that I am alone
and completely unsure of myself.
If only you were here with me,
maybe we two could show the same solidarity,
as the group of trees that sway this way and that
together as one in the tumultuous winter winds.

I inhale the bitter, freezing air,
and exhale bursts of smoke, as if my insides are really on fire,
and I am imagining that the air around me is so very cold.
I gaze about at the bleakness of the day, and I cringe as I see that I am all alone.

Will this train ever get here?
I am out on a limb, the loneliness gnawing at my heart
just a reminder of the giant leap of faith I have taken, without even a glimpse of what Kind of landing I will meet.

I fear the worst, I am too late, I have missed that train…
But in the distance I hear, such an uplifting sound
A whistle resounds and echoes across the cold, still air.
It is here, and I will ride it wherever it shall take me.

Paper Doll

When I see girls in the world acting all hard

I can't help but shake my head because of the brokenness of her heart

She didn't have a chance to be made whole

Some don't understand or even want to I suppose

But I want to put myself aside for one minute and address her

Yes HER the girl with the bruises and the scars

HER who is afraid of being with him, yet even more afraid to be without him

Her who screams and sobs as curses and fists he lobs

HER who is so down she can't even bring herself to hope

for a better tomorrow

I know how you feel.

Once upon a time I thought I was nothing

Jump Off, Tramp, whore, was the only names anybody ever called me

Dressed in the latest of fashions I see on TV

Even grown men wanted to have a piece of me

PAPER DOLL

Because plastered on my face was makeup and fake smiles

But all it took was the touch of a hand to see me crumple

up into a ball of nothingness

My hopelessness-trial

and error because once again I find myself defending 

my bad decisions against common sense and logic.

Sometimes I even felt like I deserved getting hit

Sometimes I felt like there was no way my life could be different

In my twisted reality the best that could happen to me

Was I would find someone as messed up as me

Feed me dope, Accept my internal messed up condition

And die before I reached the age of 30.

I was so hooked on the dope and the dope game

I have no idea how I even have brain cells left to maintain 

a functioning lifestyle yet, Somehow God's grace

Was big enough even for a monster in my past state.

I scorned the mercy constantly lavished on me

because rather than seeing life as a chance to make a new beginning

I saw it as a mockery because 

I was so full of myself and my own demons I could not even see
My phony constructs and world-views vs reality
But, despite my hard headedness and my stubbornness to believe
Someone insisted on loving me
Loving me when I couldn't bring myself to do it
Loving me despite the fact I had no idea how to receive it
Loving me patiently until I was ready to understand

That-
THIS paper doll had substance
THIS paper doll had strength left to make it
THIS paper doll could indeed be held in hands that were gentle enough to hold and not break her
You do as well my fragile sister.

Heart song

A dancing, twirling contradiction

Lackadaisically on a mission

Always rushing but on time

If life was a book, her words would always be off the lines. 

Hopelessly scattered, stoically resigned

To the fact that impatience is based on relative time

A practical daydreamer 

A radical proponent for the conventional

Typical in most ways especially the unusual

And her heart is best listened to 

When her words are written
rather than spoken to you. 

Words and Footprints

Words and Footprints are very similar.

So watch what you say.

What kind of imprints are you leaving on other’s minds?

Are you inspiring, or destructive?

Do others look back on conversations with you and smile?

Or are they still trying to forget?

I hope my conversation is preserving, and encouraging,

Even when it has to be firm and strong.

Sometimes your opinion is more right than someone else’s

But at the end of the day, it’s still just an opinion

So it doesn’t matter

Gossip is like walking through somebody’s house when you have muddy shoes on.

You leave stains and dirt everywhere you go.

No matter how much that person tries to clean their floor,

There will always be a remnant of where you stepped.

There may even be a place that they completely miss.

They might not see it, but you know it’s there.

Others that come by may see it too.

So wipe your feet before you go into someone’s home… or life.

Proverbs says A talebearer revealeth secrets: 

but he that is of a faithful spirit concealeth the 

matter.

Which title do we possess?

We can be gentle in the way that we approach others

Even when our paths cross in the most inopportune of ways

There’s no need to stomp all over someone else

Words and footprints are very similar

They leave marks everywhere you go

Misconception or Illusion?

If life is what we make of it
How important is our perception?
Does our vision really shape our reality?
Is our ability to internalize the external surroundings
More important than what is really set before us?
I can tell so much about a person
By what they choose to see in others.
Do they see the flaws and what makes him, human?
Or do they see the soul that merely desires to be uplifted?
I don't think we need to look at the world through rose colored lenses
and gloss over whatever negatives are present
I just feel like we put too much stake in our own masks
While mocking the ones that other's choose to adorn
in hopes of making someone just notice them.
But I feel like we often miss the beauty of the rose
Because our fear won't let us see past the thorn.
When some get caught up in a game of wanting to be loved
They are only scorned.
We don't always treat people as if they were fearfully and wonderfully made
We don't always feel like we were either
And we have to change that.
It's not truth if what they perceive is an illusion anyway
That's like believing in a magic trick-
Or politicians-
 or that certain colors make you look like you lost weight
You're still the same regardless.
A lot of the pain in this world comes from faulty understanding
And lack of critical thinking skills lead to misconceived notions
And those become reality in its own way.
But no matter how dark the dark gets
It can't change the fact
That it has only one, single, solitary  way to react
When faced with the illumination of it's only natural enemy.
See, darkness can only exist where light is not present
And enlightenment itself is a form of luminescence
Given to all so freely in abundance
Turn away from the mockers who drink violence
And subsist off of our emotions
And taste freedom on your tongue
And swallow it down into your throat
Let it permeate into your very nature and fix what once was broken

Mama Said

She said only those with skin like us can understand how to make US better
But I wonder why it is that those with skin like us is what caused us to search 
for salvation to begin with
Don't trust the white man is what we are taught
But if your own folks cause you pain then who is there left to trust?
It's not that we don't think that there's a better way than what we know
 it's just that we don't want others to see our shame. 
Men who shared my heritage and struggle
Were the ones who taught me I was worthless
Women who had the same affectations in their voices and words as I do
Were the ones who always made me feel like an outsider
We do wrong too
It doesn't matter what skin color reveals to our eyes because it will never reveal the truth of ones 
character-what's really inside
Ones actions in the heat of the moment may betray ones true passions
But even those are not indicative of who you are
Passions come and go
Like waters and waves they ebb and flow
Contradict what's in a man's head
Lack of logic leads to our most primal instinct
Passion and skin may as well be disposable as far as worthy judgments go
It's the daily intent
The cultivation of proper intention
And the release of ones understanding and purpose
Developed habits that become a person
My skin will not define me
And neither will my ethnicity
Though I see similarities in the beautiful slope of my, cultural sisters, eyes
She is not automatically one I choose to be aligned with.
The struggle of MY people
refer to those who know that they are in need of Him.
I don't want to be consumed with the passing tides
of society's current offense
Let me be alone to learn what I need to do to please the One who created
Everything that is in existence.
I will hate what He hates
Because His way don't change
Although ethics and morals according to OUR standard may differ
Truth says that He stays the same yesterday, today, and forever
I sometimes wish I could unzip my skin
Let them see what's underneath
Of all of us is not so different
Maybe the sight of our flesh beneath the cutaneous would be less offensive
and divisive
I say that tongue in cheek but whatever
If we were all blind
A kind word would still illuminate
If we were all deaf
A simple hug would speak volumes

Flickered Out

The light of realization

Always flares in spite of resistance

Flicker in and out

But shines in indignation

Men and women lead revolt

Fueled by waves of their emotions

Carrying anger and rage for others

Flailing arms and screaming mouths

Drowning in the ocean

They must needs justification

So they cry for Justice

War paint on faces

Only to be led even further astray

Down the path of their own way

Ignorance is not bliss

As some ignorant would say

It is merely a distraction

From facing and dealing with the pain

We put on masks just like a clown

Set flames to the edges watch the whole place burn down

And all for what?

Fear is a repercussion of 

Having no enlightenment

It comes from choosing to remain 

in a blanket of darkness

Hatred

Anger and

Bitterness

It hates the light

Because the Light displaces darkness

And gives not 

Room for a blanket

Or covering
People become shocked 

at the starkness

Of their own logic

Or lack thereof

It's like they are naked

Vulnerable

and 

Although this vulnerability comes with a price

What one receives is 

So much more valuable

Take my advice

Open your mind

Guard your heart

Our emotions are deceitful it's been that way from the start. 

Stop letting fear determine who you are

You are a Poem to me

It's like my mind is always going

Everything I see I see in Poem

Melodies of words

Cadence from ear to ear

Sometimes getting lost in a dream or reverie

You could say that about 95% of my day

Is devoted to creating

Rhymes and verses about

Washing dishes, how cluttered my purse is

You know just

Everyday things

Because, whatever I do

I can't escape it; words have such power over me

In other words, besides those already spoken

You are in everything I see

In my mind I've never misspoken

But out loud sometimes the message becomes broken

My tears of Joy, sadness or anger sometimes the token

Of having a spirit of overwhelming emotion

Toward someone as magnificent and amazing as You.

When I clean the bathrooms

I do it singing

Praises of wonder while I'm surrounded

By comet, bleach and hot water

Because there's more to everything than meets the eye

Whatever I am on the outside

It only matters what I am within

Does my smile hide my heart's cry?

Or is it a reflection

Of the joy because past hurts and sins

Have been

Washed away and now forgiven?

I want to be realistic and logical

But sometimes reality is better than my dreams though

And I am grateful, so grateful

For You

My Muse

Everything about my character I want lined up with what You do

How you think, what you see

Sometimes I feel I'm on the brink

Of going insane

Until You remind me of who I am again

So, I keep Your Name upon my lips

Your spirit flow will be evidenced

In the way I walk

The way I talk

The way I live

Until this book is fully written.

Peace

Mirror Mirrorr

I reason within reason

My personality goes with the seasons

My light may dim and flicker

But it will never die.

The pictures a distraction

Our reactions just a fraction

Of the truth and heart of the matter

Our obsession with the morbid

Our attraction to our anger

Fans the flames of destruction

Vultures feed upon blood splatters

Rumors of war

Twitterverse explaining

With what little information

it may have pertaining-

To nothing at all, really.

Our voices speak in unison

Put our words into motion

Causing yet more division

Between what's us and them.

But little do we know 

the more we isolate

The house once standing on foundation

Now broken, desolate.

Our self-righteous indignation

is merely a deflection

of the sin that we have present 

within our own existence.

Our hatred a reflection

Of our greatest fears

But I am rested

in blessed assurance

that I am not alone

And I will carry on

When I look upon this mirror

I see my face is gone.

My opinion

Is important to me,

But in the greatest scheme of things

Maybe not as great as He.

I empty myself of all of me

I want to be a reconciled
to the One that created me

A redeemed soul

Nothing less, please

and nothing more.
Sometimes laying our swords
down is the greatest act of strength in war
Sometimes reasoning is better than defeating
Sometimes a kind word turns away wrath
Sometimes it's not too late to turn back
But you only get that one chance.
The tongue of the wise
makes knowledge acceptable
Maybe they didn't receive your Word
Because your methods were contemptible
But what do I know?
I'm just a nobody, like everybody else.

Delivered

What seemed like living the high life became something that was death to me

My need for alcohol began drowning me

Because I would wake up everyday needing a sip

Or a pint

My ability to speak and function confined

By the bars of this jail, this second bottle of wine

My yearning for necklaces made by Tiffany

Began choking me

To the point where nothing my husband ever bought me was

Pleasing to an adequate degree

I became bitter when my neck and my wrists were not adorned

With the intricate brilliance

And my husband's love, scorned

I began to suffocate from the tight clothing I wore

My intentions to have eyes focus on my body's undulations

And movements because I loved how my curves

Could draw attention

And I became anorexic

Beauty on the outside, sickness on the inside like pure contradiction

What does my salvation mean to me?

I am now free from the tyranny of a world that wants to rule me

Men who want to bed me

And women who want to defeat me

I don't want to spend my life in competition

With my sisters, my kindred spirits, no other women

I don't want to down another drink

Just to hide the guilt of allowing

Yet another perverted, disgusting, non-committal man to touch me

I don't want to put another line up my nose

So I can stem this pain, emotional

I just want to be at peace 

With this woman I have come to terms with being

I don't buy into the hype that I have to be one way or another-

Because I find I am typical in every regard

In that I am like a rubix cube of many personalities

Sometimes serious, sometimes funny

My best pictures are taken candidly

Most times even keeled, sometimes on the brink of insanity,

With a tenacity to be better than my yesterday me,

Sometimes spiritual, despite my humanity.

A multi-faceted umpteen carat diamond-

Bravery, femininity, weakness and strength my mixture 

The Curse of Adam

Recently all these things have come to light

This new process of learning called common core has got everybody in a fight

Like, we were so used to the old way of learning

That any threat to the way things were just is unacceptable

We always say "things ain't like they used to be 

In my day we had it so great"

Yet day in day out we work to give our kids a better life than what we had

Does nobody see the contradiction or the twist in the logic

Other than me?

I mean, the way that my mind works is

I heard both sides of this current hot topic

and I asked myself

What is the big deal?

Not because I don't care, or because I'm in agreement

I just like to question everything

And find out the answers

And then make a determination

So what if my children learn something in a different way than I did?

As long as they know Truth

Can't no standards of secular education twist that

They can do what it takes to better their education

If it makes them viable for college, or a global job market

Like it says, then whether or not

I can do the math as good as them

Isn't really that much of an issue

I can learn it if they can too

But I can also argue for the other side

I'm American, I'm good at arguing

But I have argued myself until I was blue in the face against it

And aint' nothing changed

Not only that but like

People got so twisted over public education

They don't want teachers to rule our children

But they want them to be responsible for a large part of the raising process

To me it's kind of like a double standard

I mean something has got to give

And I sat and pondered
We become educated so that we can have a job
We work at that job in order to pay for our education
Supposedly we better ourselves in the process
But I have yet to see any proof of this
Spend most of our lives in some type of system
Education then work then retirement stipends...

Like, Americans in general are a slave to mass consumption

We work just to assume loans and credit

And become slaves to our debt

My 'dream house' is still literally a dream

Because until I can pay the bank off

It don't belong to me

I sometimes wonder

What it would be like

to disappear

Leave this madness called life and run away to the woods

or the mountains

Even if I do my best to live a holy life

The money I spend on everyday things goes to one side or the other in this fight

Starbucks funnels money to those who are anti-traditional marriage

A well known fact but Christians be buying this overpriced coffee by the gallon

It don't even taste that good

But I haven't had Starbucks in a minute

Gas is expensive

Big corporations have faulty and immoral business practices

Some of them even put money into the hands of those connected with terrorists

And this is my legacy, my contribution as well

Because I choose to buy

Whatever they sell

But this culture is so prevalent you really can't run from it

We just have to realize our impact on one another

is so inextricably connected.

Due to the rise in the usage of social media outlets

All of a sudden everyone is an expert in something

But nobody cares to dig deeper than the surface

We just want instant gratification

See! This guy agrees with me, I'ma retweet him

So all my followers can know and see that I am validated

Wikipedia and Google; Internet the information Superhighway 

It's a shame that we are fine with just settling for the rhetoric

It's sad when we can't think deeper than how something will affect us on a micro scale.

We are willfully ignorant

Choose a side because from where we stand

It looks like there's a difference

Politicians be good at feeding off our emotions

On a grander scale

We all just need salvation

From this beast that we have created

From others,

Ourselves

Our way of thinking.

Realize that there is someone higher 

a purpose much deeper

Than Me.

My Voice

Hear Me

I will not be silenced because of your indignation

The cadence of My Voice

Places emphasis on the situation

The inflection of My Words

Spoken a reflection

of my inner soul

A heart once broken

now mended

And whole.
So I speak clear
Though others may jeer
I will not be dismayed
I will speak with intent sharp enough
To wipe that jeer off their face

I speak my truth

Though it may be of no consequence to you

I am cognizant of my audience

I must relate importance

And power without dominance

Forgive my brusqueness

But I must insist on being persistent-

My Voice

It waivers and becomes thin not by choice

At others it booms high in rejoice

Sometimes even I am caught unaware of what's inside

Not that I purposely hide

Anything in the recesses of my  mind

It's just my heart decides when it will confide

The message inside

Express it outside by- 

my Voice.

When I put on a show of bravado

The timbre of my voice

May be somewhat low

But still you can hear it shaking though

Like at times when I'm trying to talk myself into feeling-

Braver than I really feel

My heart sometimes needs a pep talk before my true nature is revealed 

With my voice I roar in triumph

After crying and griping my way through trials

Obstacles sometimes look like Goliath

But I can be one of those hard headed chicks

Somewhat defiant

And at times I have a 'never say die' attitude

While at others, I would rather curl up in bed 

and let someone else just handle it

...my voice?

Is so funny at times

Like I can say the same word once, or twice

and they be sounding completely different like day and night
Sometimes ravaged by angst
While at others I am giving thanks
Like when I call to You.
On my knees it felt like I could never get up again at times
Only to now look back and say
I guess it wasn't so bad I mean
Look at where I am today
my voice
Drowned out by a simple whisper
Reassurance that You will always be here
You will not leave me or forsake me
I am with a hope, a comforter
You know the thoughts you have for me
Never evil; always peace
No matter what there remains a promise just for me
my voice
Reveals you are strongest when I am weak
Pure Truth I will always aim to speak

Set a watch, O LORD, before my mouth; keep watch over the door of my lips.

Meditate on Your Words so I can come to grips

With the understanding that by you I find strength

I am equipped

my voice

Does nothing of any importance

If I don't speak in accordance 

With your love; some may put on a good performance

But it's all just lip service if they come

of their own volition.

I come in peace that surpasses all understanding

Lay down this sword my whole life I've been brandishing

Because now I know...

Words cut like scissors through paper

Walls become insurmountable, wounds become deeper

Souls once full of vigor now languishing

All because WE chose to speak while
 lacking the desire for self-examining.

my voice.
Will be used to bring glory to You.

It will be like a beacon for your light to shine through.
By the time my life is finished
I hope that by me they can hear you 

Life as a Meme

It’s like we live a cartoon life

With words set upon a computer generated background

That describe

Things we may be too afraid to say ourselves

Or even out loud

In front of our friends

We feel a need to disguise-

But somehow feel more comfortable expressing

By something we call memes.

I’m so sick and tired of

The pseudo-psychobabble being spewed by online bloggers

Not necessarily researched just sounds good

And/or applies to the author

And whoever may agree with his point of view

Illustrating why this ‘type’ of personality is so bullied

But it’s like we can adopt the victim mentality

For anything now days it seems

To the young man or woman just dying to find your own voice

Speak clearly when your spirit is stirred

And the more you do you will find that others may disagree or concur

Drawing lines between you, him and her

More clearly than ever before

Stop trying to fit yourself into a box

Or a particular sect of people

Because sooner than later they may discover

They don’t want to fit in with you

Find your identity and strength in something

That doesn’t negate or change your personality

But makes you better than you ever dreamed to be

Christ is my strength,

His Word is my mirror

It shows me the flaws that lay beneath the exterior

The things no meme can describe through a pretty picture

Psychological quizzes aren’t necessarily true

We all answer questions with fogged up lenses

We look at ourselves through

What would make us seem ‘the best’ in a response?

Our mind can play tricks on us

Our heart is deceitful

We feed our flesh according to our ego

But none of those things really teach us

Just affirms the best things about ourselves

That we personally have conceived

An illusion so powerful

That we sometimes gloss over

The delusions we hold to match a certain personality type

I was a psych major, I can tell the difference between real and hype

This disorder is something we all face

When our faith is misplaced

Fool ourselves into thinking we are in competition with one another

A false race

To win favor and a prize from the same ones

We wish to displace

From a high place we have raised up in our own minds

Insane.

Facebook is great

Twitter is fun

Instagram a great online photo album

But come back to reality every now and again

Only to find the same boring life

Instead of dressing up a false impression online

Why not work to make reality as great as it can seem

On a meme

On a computer screen

Just Be You

Just be yourself is the common saying
Like as if I wake up day to day switching masks
With costume changes
Despite my ability to be up or down
It is still MY personality like makeup on a clown
Sometimes I wish I could be somebody else
Some seem to be better at everything I admit it makes me jealous
They even fall more gracefully
They seem to be them unashamedly
and I, me inescapably
When I refuse to do something, It's just because I'm fearful
When I decide to step out I'm a power seeking Jezebel
And I'm like, Whatever I just want to give up
Because what's the use in even trying if my intentions in their heads is all messed up
They say don't live to please others
But if you don't then you are unwanted by your own brothers
Try as I have in the past I just don't fit in any box that I have come across yet.
And people like to point their fingers and jest
Sometimes I felt like nobody was my friend
But then there's her-
Her with the eyes that seek MY approval
Her with the lips that speak joy so Truthful
Her with the voice like a heaven sent angel
Her with the ability to make me stand like I'm the man, okay not really-but
The Head Boss on Campus
Like I never deal with feelings of being inadequate
Mommy is what she calls me
Mommy is the term she utilizes when she recognizes that her abilities at the moment
may not be enough to obtain the thing that she is desiring
And despite her frustration that she can't do all things alone
I smile with glee at her imprecision
Because I reassure her 'Sooner or later, she is going to get it'
and every single attempt is another learned lesson
And when I feel like there is something I am doing wrong as mommy
He comes in and lifts me up readily
Wifey is what he calls me
He doesn't say much- in the way that I do
But I look in his eyes and he gives me this smile like
he's saying 'I believe in you'
He says I am the strongest person he has ever known
But he has carried me through my trials so many times I've lost count
He hangs on to my every word when he feels down
Like he's drawing strength and wisdom from my mouth
He's one of the most respectable, honest and intelligent people I have ever known
And he says he needs me?
And I know that I can never be happy if my identity
is inextricably dependent on these people that depend on me
And so I want to explain that it is not wife, nor mommy that defines me
But my personal characteristics and abilities instead that makes me
so successful and brilliant in my roles as her mommy and his help meet
I am sure that there are innumerable women who can cook better than me
Can clean better than me
Keep a happier attitude when going through personal struggles that bring me to my knees
But none of those awesome women carried my children in their bodice
Nor did they have the honor to walk down the aisle with my husband
Figuratively because we got married in a courthouse office
And there is nothing I would change about us.
Therefore, there is nothing wrong with me.
I am her, I am Crystin, I am wrong, I am right, I am full of indecision at times
While at others I am certain of my actions and full of might
I may not be enough for some, and it's okay.
I was not placed here to please they
I am thankfully, beautifully, inescapably me; anyway.

Unspoken Wars

Red white and blue,

Meaning of the colors still ring true

Ideologies battled over time

Victorious voices, history writes

Brave and courageous

Go forth in battle

Here they use legislation

Over seas methods more tactical

It is impractical to say one size will fit all

Being tactful to an extent is the height of civility

after all-

And yet, 

we lack common sense when we are no longer able

To judge between right and wrong

Our foundation quakes, becomes unstable

But I find it quite laughable

that demons disguised as angels

Dare to tout themselves

As the bringers of truth, justice and morals

Fairness and evil are not compatible

Basing our lives on an economy, collapsible

A world where everyone is jaded and skeptical

Because having faith is just irrational

But the lonely preacher, left unflappable

Voice crying out in the wilderness full of blood-thirsty animals

Light dwindles it seems

in the approaching storm clouds 

On his knees

He cries out to a God

Nobody knows or fears

He says one more day, Just one more day

through his tears.

Like clockwork the sun rises

An entire civilization completely oblivious

To the judgment it could have, probably should have

been faced with 

just the night before

I feel like more people know about who wore what to the Grammy's

And like they refuse to bow down to God

But all idolize and worship celebrities

Come on son, we talking about banning words

For being hurtful

Meanwhile in Africa and Syria

People are trying to gain the freedom to be able to speak

without getting murdered

We are too full of ourselves.

The paradox of freedom

is what most are dying to taste

We fill our head with media laced

with alcohol, drug, sex fueled propaganda 

When's the next celebrity scandal taking place?

Another soul disgraced

Makes our lives seem less mundane or something...

Whatever the case, I take a deep breath

Because tomorrow is an opportunity to try again

Luke 4:18 The Spirit of the Lord is on me, because he has anointed me to preach good news to the poor. He has sent me to proclaim freedom for the prisoners and recovery of sight for the blind, to release the oppressed

Isaiah 61:1
The Spirit of the Sovereign LORD is on me, because the LORD has anointed me to preach good news to the poor. He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim freedom for the captives and release from darkness for the prisoners,

Shine

Lord help me to accept that it is not my destiny to shine

but to be the lamp which encases the light

Transparent and fragile at first glance

But strong enough to withstand happenstance

And shine through the darkest of life's circumstance

I want to be the one whose called

out of the many to be a part of the few

Like Gideon's army-full of strength, bravery, virtue

Or like the spies who brought back a good report

about the promised Land-Despite all calls to abort

a God-given mission let me be the one to contort

the illusion of the enemy whose only mission is to thwart 

God's purpose for me

I want to be like Deborah the Prophetess whose name meant 'bee'

Because she stung her enemies with ferocity

and held wisdom which enriched others  

Which was sweeter than honey

I want to be like Joseph and embody forgiveness

I want others all around me to bear witness

that the human condition is weakness

But Christ is strength

I want to have the guts to lay down my desire to be right

My desire to always get the last word in a fight

to get one over on everyone who crosses me

To stop losing ground by making my brother out to be my enemy

I want to relinquish my false sense of hope

Stop greasing my wheels up a slippery slope

Grab hold of what's real, the Truth with true zeal

and leave well enough alone

Be at peace with The One

Word

Somehow in my mind 

I feel I just realized

Just how beautiful, the world is seen by my eyes

It must have always looked like this

But it's like I have a new perspective

Funny things like: roses smell even more like roses

The stars seem to sparkle more
the sky seems bluer
The air never smelled this sweet before
Truth now seems even truer
It's like a new life
Like I was reborn
Old pain is gone
Old burdens shorn

Work

Everything in my life I could ever do right was all wrong
People wonder why others get caught up still singing the same song
It's easy to judge when you only see from one side
Sometimes I wish I could see it from your eyes
What may seem like common sense to you
may be a revelation to me; brand new
We have to be patient with others and know
We're not all at the same level, but on the same boat
We traveling on to hopefully the same destination
Trials and set-backs may turn into preparation
A greater destiny implies greater responsibility
Nothing is denied when there is no impossibility
Hearts of stone become flesh
Eyes your own become enmeshed
With sights never imagined
But realized now nonetheless
What was once hopeless
Abundant faith is now evident
What was once worthless
Has become priceless
I never dared to dream that anyone would be inspired by me
Because all they would aspire to be was a nobody, internally empty-
Now I have a purpose
The place from which I stand shows nothing but Promise
A land in which flows milk and honey
Souls receive forgiveness, grace and mercy
Blind eyes become open
The broken receive restoration
There's hope for those who are still works in progress